The next day decided to have another day off in Oxford and avoid Christian. Spent day shopping and then got home one minute after I got in and I grabbed broom and pretended had been sweeping for hours. Jake came in the door and said ‘I have found a flat to live in will be cheaper if you leave London and move in with me’. Jake likes a bargain and this was him being romantic.
We went out for dinner to discuss and I had three large wines I ate Macaroni cheese even though was very high in fat. Then we went and saw flat. Was ugly. I insisted on looking at another overpriced flat down the road further as was exuberant with the wine. Overpriced flat was actually expensive entire huge house overlooking river. It even came with its own punt. ‘Please Jake please Jake can we live here with both our salaries half rent each we can afford’ I said. ‘No’ he said ‘you wont do anything around the house and will be out gallivanting whole time and I will be here cleaning up waiting for you paying high rent’. ‘Please won’t be like that’ I said, ‘will clean and will commute to work in London until find job in Oxford’. ‘Ok’ he said ‘but if you shaft me I will sue you and am not even joking as am lawyer’.
I made promise before having one more glass of wine at new local pub, and then stumbling back to London on bus to tell London friends I would be moving to Oxford. Got back to flat in London very late and told hot flatmate was leaving. Told him I would miss shirtless appearances. He backed away slowly. Texted gay John to get his approval. ‘You are leaving fashionista London and moving to Oxford to live in a swamp’ he texted back.
How to frantically lose weight while obsessed with hot chips.
