I had originally thought of only doing the vegan thing Monday to Friday despite the mockery this makes of the entire thing. However it's SO enjoyable have decided to see how long I can do it for. As long as I’m not being too annoying to people. But there is SO much you can do and eat being a vegan in London. I've done some research and found all the vegetarian restaurants in central London. Further, I’ve started looking at restaurant menus to see if they do vegan options. Most do. This is surprising and interesting.
So being a Friday Dario was begging me to go off the whole thing and eat some meat. We usually go and have wines at lunchtime on Fridays so we settled on a Thai lunch place where we could swallow back a quick bottle of wine in the lunch hour. Dario had an idea that we might share dishes but when we got there and there was an extensive vegetarian menu we decided to both go veggie, albeit he did it begrudgingly. He drew the line at me asking for brown rice. ‘Thai people have white rice ok?’ he hissed. ‘You are SO embarrassing’. I wanted to say what my mother used to say when we used to get embarrassed growing up which was I will GIVE you embarrassed. She used to threaten to put on gold platform shoes and flares and come down to school and REALLY embarrass us. But it couldn’t be exactly that because it's not the 70s anymore and those things are fashionable again now.
That night we were going out for a farewell dinner for work Dario to a restaurant called Bali Bali which did Indonesian food. He started on me early in the afternoon – 'you were SO annoying for lunch today can you PLEASE PLEASE eat meat tonight like a normal person? I was like ‘I might’ but really was thinking might not, work Dario, might not indeed.
As it was we had a few pints in the sun first so Dario was more relaxed by dinner time. Also his lovely boyfriend Lee had joined us and work Jane so I was able to order aubergine and onion stir-fry without getting in trouble. It was a delicious Indonesian dinner and lots of fun and merriment. Only annoyance was I could not try everyone else's but I suspect THEY were pleased with this. We went out for cocktails at some gay bars afterwards but I cut it short so Jake wouldn’t be mad at me arriving late to Oxford the next day. Apparently he does not care too much for me being late.
When I got home flatmate was home and also drunk. We decided would be fun to drink more and had several of his rums before I went to bed and appeared to have not bothered taking off any clothes or taking out contact lenses.
Day 4 being a vegan
I had to take the bus back in the morning but they give out free juice. They also give out free pains au chocolats, and free sausage sandwiches and free cheese and tomato sandwiches. I couldn’t eat any of these except the petit pain but I couldn’t face having to admit to Sally that I had cracked on the bus again. She told me once that I’m eating most of my day's calories at 6am when I do this. Plus I'm trying not to eat that refined sugary deliciousness.
So I had just the juice and had an apple when I came in to work. Dario and I went to get our coffees but he refused to come up and order with me because he finds it embarrassing that I now suddenly demand soy milk with everything.
I went to the supermarket on the way into work and got bags of dried fruits and nuts and seeds. I can now eat all these calorific little treats because they are HEALTHY and VEGAN. In your face Weightwatchers.
For lunch we went to a vegetarian cafe in Covent Garden. It is called Food For Thought and everything is gorgeous and beautiful and veggie. I had Mexican beans on brown rice. DELICOUS and vegan. Work Dario had quiche of course, because he’s gay, and then tried to make me 'just try a bite'. I wasn’t even TEMPTED by the eggs and cheese in that bad boy. This is the best diet I’ve ever been on. I’m healthy, but I’m so FULL. A whole bowl of hot food for lunch with rice? And to think Sally is eating 4 ham slices and a banana on HER stupid diet.
Sally has been in Manchester for the last few days with work. Jake wishes she would come back on account of because she’s not here to talk to I am bothering him all the live long day with trying to make conversation about eating and makeup and outfits. 'Hey there is a new deep blush coloured lip gloss by Laura Mercier' I will say. 'When is Sally back again?' he will reply.
Anyway for dinner I went home and finally had a night in. Work Dario is leaving to go back to Australia in just over a week and was bringing things into work he no longer needed like his coffee maker and other kitchen appliances for me. One of the treats he brought in was his left over Vietnamese cooking ingredients which included rice papers that you soften in warm water and glass noodles that you use to make summer rolls. So I went home and chopped up mushrooms and peppers and onions very finely and cooked them in sesame seed oil and added some peppers and then mixed this with glass noodles for the insides. They were beautiful like a healthy spring roll. And dipped them in sweet chilli sauce. Perfectly vegan. Afterwards I had a hankering for something sweet and luckily there was no chocolate in the house and so I had some watermelon. Very pleased with self.
So I had just the juice and had an apple when I came in to work. Dario and I went to get our coffees but he refused to come up and order with me because he finds it embarrassing that I now suddenly demand soy milk with everything.
I went to the supermarket on the way into work and got bags of dried fruits and nuts and seeds. I can now eat all these calorific little treats because they are HEALTHY and VEGAN. In your face Weightwatchers.
For lunch we went to a vegetarian cafe in Covent Garden. It is called Food For Thought and everything is gorgeous and beautiful and veggie. I had Mexican beans on brown rice. DELICOUS and vegan. Work Dario had quiche of course, because he’s gay, and then tried to make me 'just try a bite'. I wasn’t even TEMPTED by the eggs and cheese in that bad boy. This is the best diet I’ve ever been on. I’m healthy, but I’m so FULL. A whole bowl of hot food for lunch with rice? And to think Sally is eating 4 ham slices and a banana on HER stupid diet.
Sally has been in Manchester for the last few days with work. Jake wishes she would come back on account of because she’s not here to talk to I am bothering him all the live long day with trying to make conversation about eating and makeup and outfits. 'Hey there is a new deep blush coloured lip gloss by Laura Mercier' I will say. 'When is Sally back again?' he will reply.
Anyway for dinner I went home and finally had a night in. Work Dario is leaving to go back to Australia in just over a week and was bringing things into work he no longer needed like his coffee maker and other kitchen appliances for me. One of the treats he brought in was his left over Vietnamese cooking ingredients which included rice papers that you soften in warm water and glass noodles that you use to make summer rolls. So I went home and chopped up mushrooms and peppers and onions very finely and cooked them in sesame seed oil and added some peppers and then mixed this with glass noodles for the insides. They were beautiful like a healthy spring roll. And dipped them in sweet chilli sauce. Perfectly vegan. Afterwards I had a hankering for something sweet and luckily there was no chocolate in the house and so I had some watermelon. Very pleased with self.
Day 3 being a vegan
I was a little thirsty in the morning but otherwise, disturbingly, felt ok. Had an apple and a banana for breakfast and tried to get my usual soy cappuccino but the lady in the canteen made me a full strength milk one and then I said I needed a soy one and she said it was too late she had already poured it. I was about to argue when work Dario took over and said to the canteen lady ‘sorry about her. She’s decided two days ago to be a vegan and now just goes around annoying everyone’. The lady at the canteen just looked at me with distain, looked at Dario adoringly and then walked off.
I refused to drink it even though as Dario said I’m not a real vegan. But I just wanted to see how long I could do it without cracking and milk in my coffee is NOT worth cracking for. A triple layered cheese burger with bacon and barbeque sauce, yes. Milk, no.
At lunch we went to find vegan food, Dario moaned about how annoying I was the whole time, and suggested ideas like that I should only do the vegan thing at dinner times and other times where he is not around. I found a broad bean salad and some marinated artichokes.
For dinner I had to go to Oxford because Jake had an appointment that I said I would accompany him to. He gets all English and flustered when he has set places to be so I was ordered to be in Oxford as early as possible. I jumped on the bus and texted him to ask what we were doing for dinner and could it be something vegan please. He texted back that it was not about me and he was having KFC on his way home. I texted back that I couldn’t eat that and could he wait and we find something healthier together. He reiterated that it ‘wasn’t about me’, and that ‘he was already in a rush’ and ‘I was freaking making him freaking late’. I rang him to say where shall I meet you and he said ‘you are late I’m not meeting you now see you at home’ and hung up on me. MAN. Normally it's me that gets the rage but when he gets it it's MOST annoying and really over nothing worthwhile.
So then I texted him saying I’m about 100 metres from where you are just wait. What mistake THAT was. I got there and he proceeded to lecture me about how late I had made him and that he damn well wanted KFC and was damn well having it and then stormed off ahead of me down the street, which was good coz when he was all stormy he wasn’t yelling at me. But then he would stop and turn around and come back to yell more. I couldn’t walk faster than him, so was stuck as being in heels and slower I couldn’t get away but I had desperately rethought the whole making him wait for me thing and wanted to lose him. I thought about ducking down a side alley and hiding like in a movie but knew this would make him more mad.
He went to KFC so I went to subway and ordered a vegetarian subway on whole wheat bread. I had chilli sauce and honey mustard sauce and just HOPE none of those had egg or anything in it. Jake walked ahead of me all the way home and when we got home I sat quietly in the corner eating the subway trying not to get in any more trouble.
His meal involved a burger with fried chicken in it and a side of more fried chicken, coleslaw chips and beans. ‘ Do you know what they do to chickens?’ I ventured tentatively. ‘YOU ARENT A REAL VEGAN’ he yelled. We went back to silence. When I went to the kitchen I walked behind his sofa and did the fingers at it like 20 times at his back to get some of the irritation out. ‘I can see you in the reflection’ he said coldly. Then we went to his stupid appointment. Have been a vegan for two days and MAINLY just made people hate me at this point.
Oh and when I got home I was still hungry and had spicy bean soup. As soon as my scales are fixed I will start reporting if it's working yet.
I refused to drink it even though as Dario said I’m not a real vegan. But I just wanted to see how long I could do it without cracking and milk in my coffee is NOT worth cracking for. A triple layered cheese burger with bacon and barbeque sauce, yes. Milk, no.
At lunch we went to find vegan food, Dario moaned about how annoying I was the whole time, and suggested ideas like that I should only do the vegan thing at dinner times and other times where he is not around. I found a broad bean salad and some marinated artichokes.
For dinner I had to go to Oxford because Jake had an appointment that I said I would accompany him to. He gets all English and flustered when he has set places to be so I was ordered to be in Oxford as early as possible. I jumped on the bus and texted him to ask what we were doing for dinner and could it be something vegan please. He texted back that it was not about me and he was having KFC on his way home. I texted back that I couldn’t eat that and could he wait and we find something healthier together. He reiterated that it ‘wasn’t about me’, and that ‘he was already in a rush’ and ‘I was freaking making him freaking late’. I rang him to say where shall I meet you and he said ‘you are late I’m not meeting you now see you at home’ and hung up on me. MAN. Normally it's me that gets the rage but when he gets it it's MOST annoying and really over nothing worthwhile.
So then I texted him saying I’m about 100 metres from where you are just wait. What mistake THAT was. I got there and he proceeded to lecture me about how late I had made him and that he damn well wanted KFC and was damn well having it and then stormed off ahead of me down the street, which was good coz when he was all stormy he wasn’t yelling at me. But then he would stop and turn around and come back to yell more. I couldn’t walk faster than him, so was stuck as being in heels and slower I couldn’t get away but I had desperately rethought the whole making him wait for me thing and wanted to lose him. I thought about ducking down a side alley and hiding like in a movie but knew this would make him more mad.
He went to KFC so I went to subway and ordered a vegetarian subway on whole wheat bread. I had chilli sauce and honey mustard sauce and just HOPE none of those had egg or anything in it. Jake walked ahead of me all the way home and when we got home I sat quietly in the corner eating the subway trying not to get in any more trouble.
His meal involved a burger with fried chicken in it and a side of more fried chicken, coleslaw chips and beans. ‘ Do you know what they do to chickens?’ I ventured tentatively. ‘YOU ARENT A REAL VEGAN’ he yelled. We went back to silence. When I went to the kitchen I walked behind his sofa and did the fingers at it like 20 times at his back to get some of the irritation out. ‘I can see you in the reflection’ he said coldly. Then we went to his stupid appointment. Have been a vegan for two days and MAINLY just made people hate me at this point.
Oh and when I got home I was still hungry and had spicy bean soup. As soon as my scales are fixed I will start reporting if it's working yet.
Day 2 being a vegan
In line with the whole having only fruit for breakfast idea, I had an apple. And a soy cappuccino. Had the RAGE real good by mid morning as annoying patronising chauvinistic Christian guy had arranged a ‘client lunch’ inviting only the male members of this team. At lunch time me and Work Dario and Work Jane went for sushi so I could vent and I had only vegetarian ones but I was barely even concentrating on food so I hardly noticed that it wasn’t yummy because cucumber and avocado are actually quite bland. Didn’t matter though as was too busy working out how to bring about the demise of chauvinistic Christian and his stupid patriarchy by turning the matriarchy against him. Dario is in the Matriarchy. We get the gays.
Towards the end of the working day, friend Hermione who lives around the corner suggested we had a wine after work as she had had a sober weekend. I said 'yes but just two wines and then home we can NOT have 16 bottles like we normally end up doing.'
We brought a bottle of Chilean sauvignon blanc and discussed the Sisterhood and work and how annoying our boyfriends were. Once you start THAT particular conversation there is enough material for a few books and at LEAST two bottles of wine so two bottles of wine it was, AND then we had an extra glass for the road. At the end I went to the loo and came out and Hermione was sitting with two men and happily telling them about the Skinny Bitch book and demanding they read my blog, making one of them get out his Blackberry and read it INSTANTLY. Full of the joys of life we skipped home telling ourselves we felt fine and would be fine in the morning.
I realised it was 10pm and had eaten nothing but in my erm JOY I couldn’t think logically what was vegan and what was not so to be on the safe side I chopped off a huge hunk of rye bread and ate that. So that was day one of being a vegan I did not have any meat or dairy although strictly speaking should have had vegan wine. I can't really see the issue with that though, the only thing I know is that they sometimes use fish bodies to sieve the wine through or something like that. I can live with it.
Flatmate advises that I came in to the lounge chewing a large chunk of bread, demanded he put on my DVD of Peep Show and then told him not to talk to me as he was ‘not of the Sisterhood’. Hermione’s boyfriend Vince advises she came home and poured water oh his head and raved on to him about some kind of race which made no sense to him.
Towards the end of the working day, friend Hermione who lives around the corner suggested we had a wine after work as she had had a sober weekend. I said 'yes but just two wines and then home we can NOT have 16 bottles like we normally end up doing.'
We brought a bottle of Chilean sauvignon blanc and discussed the Sisterhood and work and how annoying our boyfriends were. Once you start THAT particular conversation there is enough material for a few books and at LEAST two bottles of wine so two bottles of wine it was, AND then we had an extra glass for the road. At the end I went to the loo and came out and Hermione was sitting with two men and happily telling them about the Skinny Bitch book and demanding they read my blog, making one of them get out his Blackberry and read it INSTANTLY. Full of the joys of life we skipped home telling ourselves we felt fine and would be fine in the morning.
I realised it was 10pm and had eaten nothing but in my erm JOY I couldn’t think logically what was vegan and what was not so to be on the safe side I chopped off a huge hunk of rye bread and ate that. So that was day one of being a vegan I did not have any meat or dairy although strictly speaking should have had vegan wine. I can't really see the issue with that though, the only thing I know is that they sometimes use fish bodies to sieve the wine through or something like that. I can live with it.
Flatmate advises that I came in to the lounge chewing a large chunk of bread, demanded he put on my DVD of Peep Show and then told him not to talk to me as he was ‘not of the Sisterhood’. Hermione’s boyfriend Vince advises she came home and poured water oh his head and raved on to him about some kind of race which made no sense to him.
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